Preface: Over the course of the WSOP I received an enormous amount of support through the threads of these trip reports, IM, email, facebook, and PM. I never really got around to messaging a lot of these people back, as post ME I was very busy/exhausted so I’d like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for their encouragement.

I’d also like to thank Timex/Stevepa for giving me the opportunity to play so many events. Of the team of guys they put together, I think its safe to say I was the least established and the largest gamble, unfortunately I didn’t pan out for them, though with Timex agreeing to go forward with the Vic champs, hopefully I can make it worth his while.

Lastly, I’d like to thank everyone who through the forum and especially on IM, have improved my game immensely over the last year. Guys like Grafyx, LuckyChewy, Mikej, Thay3r, DonT77, UCLAbruinz, curtains, Jurollo, Badgerpro, NoahSD, and adanthar have all been integral (sorry for anyone I’m forgetting, can’t get into my AIM list right now.) Of special notice is Ajunglen whose reviews have transformed my game over the last few months to really take it to a higher level. It came to absolutely zero surprise to me when he won his Sunday million recently. You guys and this forum are responsible for making me the player I am. End Preface.

The few days leading up to event 1 of the Vic champs have been mostly exhausting. I went from Las Vegas to Milwaukee, to Madison, to Milwaukee, to Chicago, to LA, then Sydney, and finally Melbourne. I had a few days to relax and get the apartment set up before the events started, as well as catch up with friends. Up until a few days ago, I hadn’t been in Melbourne for 13 months, and hadn’t seen most of my Ozzie friends since November in Singapore. We find time to make it to a Saints vs Hawks footy game, where the Saints crush the Hawks and win me 100 Ozzie, so boo yah and in your face Darren/Steve.

In my time studying abroad just about anyone who hung out at Crown could tell you I likely spent more time in that poker room than anywhere else. Within a few months I knew just about everyone and everything that went on in that room. Some would say the Crown poker room is full of degenerates and scumbags. Well if that’s the case they’re my favorite group of degenerate scumbags. Even though this time around I’ll mostly be sticking to online poker unless there’s a tournament series in town, I’ll always feel a certain nostalgia for the 20/40 limit days.

Walking into Crown tonight would find me having the same conversation fifty times over. “Hoooooooly shiiiiiit! Lucky Tony D. You’re back? What the [censored] are you doing here?!” Cut to the part where I inform them I’m unbanned, living in St. Kilda, and have definitely read the fine print this time. One of my favorite parts of Australian culture is their enormous informality, which is especially apparent in the casino where almost everyone I’m talking to is off work and out to have some fun. Tonight’s event is a simple $230 buy in NL holdem tournament, barely worth writing about really but I decided I’d write about everything I played. Previous to the event I run into Mark Vos and we start talking prop bets.
“Mark you want $100 last longer?”
”Only if you give me 6 to 1.”
”That’s to much. I know you can’t take this serious but that’s still to high. 3 to 1.”
”You’re on.”

In a $230 tournament, it’s a miracle if Mark can make it 90 minutes, by his own admission. Still, given that we only start with 60 BB’s and one hand gone bad and its over, this is likely a neutral EV wager.

I end up being seated on one of the red felted ‘feature tables’ along the rail and under a bunch of lights. We start with 3000 chips at 25/50 blinds and half an hour levels, much like a $1500 WSOP tournament but worse in fact, and apparently with no antes. Play gets under way and my table has one player I’m quite familiar with, my friend James Dood, one of Australia’s better players in Hold’em/Omaha. He’s on the other side of the table though, so he won’t be able to abuse me on the left. He’s in the BB on the first hand, and I immediately begin trash talking about how I’m going to blow him off his blind straight away. I’m in MP (11 handed, blegh) when the following hand develops:

I hold As Jc in MP2. All stacks 3000.
Villain is middle aged guy I’ve seen around a few times but don’t remember anything about.

Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 150, folds to SB, SB calls, BB folds.
Flop: J T 4 rainbow
SB checks, I bet 225, SB raises to 600. This is not a great spot, but this shallow I don’t think I can ever really consider folding here. J9/QJ/KJ are all in his range, though I don’t think he’s check raising me with a draw. I’m pretty sure if I shove now he’ll fold most J’s, but if I call he’ll commit himself on a safe turn. I elect to call.
Turn: 2
SB shoves, I call. SB shows KJ and I’m well in front.
River: 5

I raise the next hand and take the blinds. A couple hands later I raise again and get reraised by a guy I know in seat 1, and fold to his reraise. A round later the guy in seat 1 has continued to play somewhat aggressive but not spewy, when the following hand comes up.

I hold Jh Js in the SB. Blinds 25/50
My stack: 5800
UTG: 3300

Preflop: UTG raises to 350, folds to me in the SB. His 7x raise is really weird, but is rarely KK+. I call, BB folds.

Flop: Ks Qh Ts
I check, UTG checks.
Turn: Qd
I check, UTG checks.
River: 7h
I check, UTG bets 650, I fold. UTG proudly flips up 44. I’m not sure what else I could do, I didn’t really give him credit for 7x’ing a small pair UTG, and basically all his more likely range has me crushed on this board and isn’t folding if I bet as a bluff.

Play in this event is extremely loose/passive. People are limp calling 4-5X raises with things like J8o with a 60 BB stack and its totally the norm. While the play is bad at the WSOP, the thing with most recreational players in Australia is that the game is still quite new. Poker didn’t really find a popular stride until 2005 when Hachem won the WSOP, as the explosion of the Crown poker rooms size can tell you. When I first got there a couple weeks before Joe won, I think the Crown poker room had about ~25 tables. Now it has roughly double that. My table is no different, as there is a lot of limp calling and limp folding going on.

With the blinds having gone up to 50/100 the following hand comes up. The two limpers were very loose/weak.
My stack: ~5600
UTG+1’s stack: ~2500. Blinds 50/100, I hold Kc Qd on the button.

Preflop: UTG folds, UTG+1 limps, 1 fold, MP1 limps, folds to me on the button. I raise to 475, folds back to UTG+1 who folds, MP1 calls.

Flop: Td 5s 2d
MP1 checks, I bet 625, MP1 calls.
Turn: 9c
MP1 checks, I check.
River: Jd
MP1 bets out 900 with about 500 more behind. I’m thinking if he had a flush draw he’d mostly commit himself on the flop if he has ANY clue (poor assumption on my part) so pretty easy shove here. I put him in for his last 500, he calls and flips up a brilliantly played Kd 9d. Fair enough, I’m back to around my starting stack.

After this hand my cards dry up and seeing as everyone’s stack is so shallow, there’s no real room for creative aggressive play. The blinds go up to 100/200 and with 2800 in my stack I resteal the guy on my right with T9dd who makes it 600 and get a fold. A couple hands later I pick up AK and raise pre flop in EP, and some guy in BB tries to make a move by shoving with Q3o for 2k and my AK holds. Not sure what that was all about considering how tight I’d been for a while but hey to each his own. Then it folds to me in the SB and I raise air as the BB seemed really tight/straight forward but he calls. The flop is rags I c bet he insta jams and I fold.

A little while later with blinds now at 150/300, the following hand comes up:
My stack: ~5000
SB: 2100
I hold Tc Td in EP.

Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 800, folds to SB, SB calls, BB folds.

Flop: 3c 3d 2c
SB shoves, I call. SB shows Kc Qc. The irony is I don’t think he even planned on stopngo’ing me on any flop, he just saw a hand he liked and called, then got a dream flop and crammed.
Turn: Ac
River: Ks

[censored], now I’m crippled. A blind steal a little bit and stay around 3000. When we get back from the break the BB has yet to show up and I’m sitting with about 3000. The blinds are 150/300 and the button is a fairly aggressive player with a big stack. It folds to him and he raises to 800. I look down at Kc 9c and insta jam. He calls and flips up 66.

Flop: Ac 8c 5h
Turn: 8d
Just a few outs here.
River: 3h

Oh well. On the plus side I won my $100 last longer off Mark who started shoving blind an hour in. I run into Mark later and after getting some food we head down to the poker room and decide to organize an in house home game. We recruit 10 players and set up a game of $25 buy in, 1-2 blinds, one rotation NL holdem, one rotation NL Omaha hi. The game is mostly drunk, loud and boisterous, and I run horrible and lose like $400. Oh well, tomorrow is the $1100 HU event, which given that it’ll be more SNG structure than cash game should play to my advantage.

Tonight I went out with friends to celebrate a totally pointless 6 weeks of life. We got very drunk and this is what happened:

Watts/Stevepa/JohnnyVincent and I go to dinner tonight at Buzios and pay our bill with $340 in vouchers plus additional money for tip.

We order much wine at Buzios and I begin to get drunk. I attempt to convince Johnny Vincent to come out tonight, but he refuses unless he can find his favorite magical powder. I tell him booze is good enough and more civil, he tells me he’s to tired. I call him a pussy.

We go to Coyote Ugly at New York New York. I get increasingly wasted, a 40 year old woman tells me I am a fine piece of ass while trying to dance with me. I tell her I am 22 and have a girlfriend. I enter a meaningful conversation with a bartender about her married life and how her husband feels about her working here getting hit on all the time. She tells me my cigar smoke is disgusting. I ask if she’d rather be talking to some [censored] who’s trying to sleep with her.

I become super friendly with some black dude named Jerrod who works in real estate and tells me he’s going to take me to a Raiders game. I tell him numerous times that he better not be [censored] messing with me, and he promises he isn’t since I hooked him up with a cigar and him and his wife up with a drink and we got wasted. Go Raiders unless they are playing the Packers.

We go to the MGM grand. I am absurdly drunk and we run into Aaronbeen and Kush. I call up the operator for some such reason, then attempt to smooth talk her into coming out with us. She more or less agrees. I tell Sirwatts that we are going to the front desk to find the operator ‘Vanessa’ and that he is going to be “Tony” who talked to her on the phone. Watts begrudgingly accepts.

On the way to the front desk I see a promotional Dodge Viper on top of some slot machines. I attempt to leap onto the top of the slot machines but am so wasted I fall over onto the floor yelling “FUUUUCKING VIPER!!!” after pulling open the door of the car and falling backwards, sprawled out everywhere having thrown over a slots chair.

Watts and I arrive at the front desk. We demand this so called “Vanessa” who according to the woman at the front desk, does not exist. I tell her to stop lying to me. She says there is no such Vanessa. Watts and I withdraw.

On the way back towards our party Watts and I run across a bridal party. I stop and attempt to explain to them what a fine catch Sirwatts is. Watts looks at me with contempt, as do the girls. At some point I attempt to grab Sirwatts and throw him over my shoulder, but instead end up tackling him in the middle of the casino. I then run off from Watts laughing hysterically at all the stupidity and stumble about in a drunken stupor. This would be the last impression Watts ever has of me for the discernable future. I attempt to find my way back to the party but everyone appears to be gone.

After completely failing to find my friends I wander over to the front of the Mirage asking people who work at the hotel “Damn it man! Where are the taxis in this ungodly place!?” They point me in the right direction. I collapse into a Taxi and tell him to take me to the Korean BBQ, then change my mind to just go to the Rio and desperately try not to pass out in the cab.

I get back to my room and write a fairly mediocre trip report.

I convince Sirwatts to spend an entire day out Wednesday wasting time and eating food so I’ll be appropriately tired that night. The plan works and when I hit my pillow around 3:30 I fall straight out. When I awake at 11:30 to play, I feel much better than on day 2. If I can get a good soft table full of guys concerned with making the money, I’ll have myself another massacre.

I get to my table and find a totally different scenario. For starters, on my immediate right with 400k is Imper1um. In seat 8 is Stevebets, and most of the table seems competent and not to worried about making the money. Imper1um and I have played at the Bellagio and he’s at least fairly familiar with my aggressive game, luckily having him on my immediate right negates his ability to run over me with three bets. I start the day with $292,500 and with the table playing aggressively, I keep most of my aggressive plays to late position.

Early hands of minimal interest includes 3 betting Imper1um with JJ and him folding. In another hand the button a very old and sloppy aggressive Spanish player who DOES NOT FOLD raises and I call with 22 in the BB. The flop is T8T and we both check. Turn is a Q I check and he bets only 10k. I know he’s pretty spewy aggressive so I decide to give him one call. River is a 4 and we both check, I expect to be good but he shows me JJ. Owned? He certainly had a hand I never saw coming.

I raise 99 utg and get cold called by a guy with about 80k. The flop comes T64 two clubs, I bet and he shoves. I’m pretty sure he’s not cold calling my utg raise without a pair or shoving here without at least 15 outs, but most always an over pair, so I deliberate and fold.

For a while after the 99 hand I play very tight, as my stack has slipped to about 270k. After folding a round or two I decide to make an UTG steal with just about any 2 cards, as I’m pretty sure Imper1um will respect it in his BB. I peek down at 95o utg 8 handed and the following hand develops:
Blinds 1500/3000 with 400 ante.
My stack: ~270k
MP1: ~330k

Preflop: I raise to 9500, folds to MP1, MP1 calls, all others fold.

Flop: 8 7 6 two diamonds.
MP1 in this hand is a younger Asian guy who works for Pokerstars in Costa Rica. He knows I’m a smart and aggressive player and we’ve been chatting and friendly. I lead out for 13k, he calls pretty quick.
Turn: 2s
Awesome card. I think about my bet size, then lead out a large 40k, hoping that if he raises it’ll force him to commit for my stack. He grabs a full stack of orange 5000’s and raises to 100k. I go into the tank for about 5-10 seconds, then move all in. MP1 asks for a count. He tanks, counts up his chips, stares at me, tanks some more. He stands out of his seat, sighs out loud, can’t seem to figure out what to do. I figure he absolutely must have an over pair and that he worries I have a set, so I’ve got to be WAAAAAAAY good here, like him drawing dead good. He counts out the 134,800 more to call, announces “lets gamble, you got a straight?” and slides it into the middle.
“Yea, straight” I reply.
Unfortunately for me MP1 is by no means drawing dead and flips up 88. I can’t even believe he thought about it, if I was in his shoes I would’ve smashed my chips into the middle Phil Hellmuth style. There’s almost 600k in the middle which I think would be good for the chip lead at this point, and I just got to dodge 10 outs on one card.
River: 7
I don’t even react. No yell, no scream, no slapping, just staring at the card. I look over at MP1 and say calmly “Well, that’s unfortunate.” I shake his and Imper1um’s hands, wish them and the table luck, and walk off.

Why didn’t I react? Why wasn’t I angry? I don’t know, I mean, what did I really expect? It’s been like this for 6 weeks now, and every time I need to win that one key hand to put me in a truly excellent position to do something great, I will inevitably have it blow up in my face. I’m sure if I looked back on the trip reports it’d seem all totally unfair, but what’s the point in getting worked up? Six weeks of live is the rough equivalent of 3 days of online play, and who really cares if you run bad for 3 days?

Most of what I feel is just exhaustion. I’m tired of all this; of Vegas, of casinos, of hotels, and most of all of failing. The failing is more depressing and discouraging than it is infuriating. This will be the last trip report for some time, I’m going home. I’m not sure when the next time I’ll play serious live poker is, knowing me I’ll be annoyed with the situation and then a week later I’ll snap back to live and want to get back in there. Australia has a Victorian poker championship coming up with a $15,000 AU buy in event not to mention numerous others, so maybe I’ll take a shot. I don’t know, it’s all too much to think about right now. I’m out.

Vegas Trip Summation:
Tournaments played: Like 25-30ish.
Cashes: 4
Final tables: 1
Total value of all cashes: ~20,000
Total cost of all buy ins: Oh god, to take a shot in the dark here, ~80,000? Did I really lose Timex/Steve 60k? That’s gross. Sorry guys.

My whole life I’ve been pretty lucky in regards to health and physical concerns. I’m allergic to nothing; never been seriously ill, fast metabolism, etc. Unfortunately somewhere around my teen years I developed two annoying physical problems:
A. I have a lot of trouble getting to sleep and maintaining a normal sleep schedule.
B. I have an extremely sensitive stomach.

Worst of all, one problem tends to beget the other. If I get under 8 hours of sleep I can count on with about 95% accuracy my being quite sick to my stomach the next morning. I looked it up on WebMD and apparently this is just a consequence for not getting enough sleep for some people. On those days I never know if my next meal will turn my intestines to hell and ruin me for hours. So what tends to happen is on some night where I plan on getting 9 hours of sleep I lie in bed unable to sleep for an hour, then realize I’ll only be getting 8, then realize if I don’t fall asleep very soon I’m going to be sick. Ever tried falling asleep when you’re thinking “man I really got to get to sleep right now”? Yea, good luck with that. Then I inevitably wake up feeling sick for the rest of the day, which if it carries on through the evening makes it even harder to fall asleep. The only ways I’ve found to stop the cycle of insanity is either sleep medication, or having days where I don’t have to wake up for anything. The problem with those days then is that my body tries to catch up by making me sleep a bazillion hours totally ruining my schedule, so next time I need to get to bed at a decent hour my body will think its way to early.

It’s the night before day 2a. I’ve had a quiet evening where I’ve had dinner with friends, watched a good movie, had some food, wrote, taken a sleeping pill, and tried to get to bed early. Unfortunately my schedule got [censored] by our playing until 4am on day 1 and I didn’t wake up until 5pm today. When I finally manage to fall asleep at about 4am my body snaps awake at 8am, my schedule being so [censored] my body thinks that period was a nap and not its proper sleep time. I lie in bed for another 90 minutes praying my mind will click back off, but it’s not happening. [censored] it, I can play on 4 hours sleep, I’m just going to need Pepto-Bismol and Redbull.

I waste time on my computer for a an hour or two then head downstairs to the little shop in the Rio and buy the much needed Pepto. I feel fairly good and awake for 4 hours of sleep. The Pepto does pretty well at making my stomach chill the [censored] out. I’ll just take my annoyance of the situation out on my much short stacked table.

I show up a bit early to the table and have a look around. I had read the list correctly, everyone is quite short and nobody is over 40k. Most of the table is in their 30’s or 40’s as well, with only a couple younger guys. This is very good news. The cards get in the air at 500/1000 blinds with 100 ante and the massacre begins.

For the first 2 hours at the table I find nobody is willing to play with me. At one point I raise J9o and a short stack shoves and I call getting 2 to 1 and beat his 77. That was about the last time anyone screwed with me. My BB got walked about two thirds of the time (seriously) and my open raises were almost never three bet. Eventually another larger stack of maybe 120k gets moved to the table 2 on my right, and he’s a fairly aggressive Euro player. I put my table captain hat on begin making his life miserable with 3 bets. In this period, there is absolutely zero interesting hands. I don’t think I played one hand past a flop, and my C bets were getting an absurd amount of respect. The only other young guy at the table stares at me for a moment then asks
”Where do I know you from dude?”
“I don’t know, have you played a lot of the events?”
”Nah, just got here.”
”Play in Australia ever?”
”Never been there. I don’t know, you seem really familiar though.”
I realize where he knows me from, but I decide not to say anything. It’s to early in the morning to be doing impressions.

About 3 ½ hours into the day I get moved, which is unfortunate because my table was letting me get away with all the murder I’d planned. I arrive at my new table, where the line up goes as follows (and would only change by one player all day) :
Seat 1: Older guy of about 55 or 60. Very very tight weak.
Seat 2: Younger guy of maybe 30ish. Wearing a Ladbrokes qualifier shirt. If the land of Nitdom needed a king, this is their guy.
Seat 3: A tight but at least a little more aggressive English guy of about 35 or 40. He’s a cool guy.
Seat 4: Laggy Asian guy of about 30. He’s not a good sort of LAG though (as you’ll find out) as he often open raises 4 or 5 or even 6X at totally random times and seems tilt capable. I’m 90% sure he wasn’t a famous one either. He is the other big stack on the table with around 250k (I show up with about the same.)
Seat 5: A mid 30’s black dude who according to TheWacoKid is in the music industry and plays not bad. He’s kind of on tilt when I get there and seems unsure of his decisions after apparently blowing off some chips to seat 4.
Seat 6: Me.
Seat 7: A young guy from Melbourne Australia named Tim. When I hear his accent we get talking and hit it off pretty well. Unfortunately for Tim he is playing WAAAAAAY to weak tight, that or the most card dead I’ve ever seen anyone.
Seat 8: A very nice/talkative 50ish guy who is a huge nit.
Seat 9: A 30ish Singaporean guy who got 2nd in the 5k Singapore event to Tony G. He is a little more loose but not necessary loose aggressive.

When I arrive at the table I realize that seat 4 is really playing table captain here and raising a lot of pots. Nobody on the table seems interested in stopping him. That is, nobody until I showed up. A couple rounds in the following hand develops:
Blinds 600/1200 with 200 ante.
My stack: ~250k
Seat 4: ~250k
Seat 5: ~80k
I hold Q5o in the BB.

Preflop: Folds to seat 4 on button, button raises to 5000, SB looks extremely unsure of himself and his decision then calls. I make it 22000, button insta mucks. SB spends more time feeling unsure of himself then folds. I then rip the metaphorical table captain hat off seat 4’s head.

I start raising a [censored] load. Nobody seems interested in stopping me. At some random point I three bet seat 4 again, who calls and check folds to me on the flop. We go on break and I tell people how I’m in the mid to high 200’s and various people insult me for my absurd luck in regards to table draws. When I get back from the break I am absurdly hungry and seat 4 has a box of small cookies. He offers them to me.
“Oh thanks so much man, I am starving.”
”No problem, take all you like.”
”Oh man, you’re my new best friend. I promise, no more pre flop 3 bets.”
“I wish I’d had these cookies an hour ago then.”
The Brit in seat 3 chimes in (who I’d 3 bet once) “I’ll go buy you a box then!”

For about an hour or so everything goes calm. The Singaporean guy in seat 9 massively sucks out the black guy in seat 5 with a totally retarded hand (4 betting all in with AJo vs black guys KK and flopping AJA when black guy was being a huge nit) and eventually seat 5, who has 4 BB’s left, gets knocked out. A new guy gets moved to the table, a quite tight Asian guy of about 30 who has ~150k. Seat 4 and I take turns open raising and crushing the table, and we both move our stacks into the low 300ish area. About an hour in the following hand comes up with seat 4:
Me: ~300k
Seat 4: ~300k
Blinds 800/1600 with 200 ante. I hold Qc Qd on the CO.

Preflop: Folds to seat 4, seat 4 raises to 5000, HJ folds, I tell seat 4 “Sorry man I gotta break my promise this one time. I was good for a while though” and make it 16500 (note: I talk a lot on the tables without interrupting hands or being rude/insulting. I make a real effort to get friendly with everyone at the table. It’s a lot harder for people to pull the trigger on guys they are friendly towards than an anonymous face. Don’t believe me? Try it.) It folds back to seat 4 who calls.
Flop: Qs Js 5d
Seat 4 checks, I bet 21k, he folds. I flip up my QQ and say “hey look man, see I’m honest, it was necessary this time. We’re still friends right?”
He laughs and tells me we’re still friends.

Again for about 20 minutes things are calm and seat 4 and I mop up the table but have no confrontations. With about 10 minutes to go before the dinner break the following hand comes up:
Me: ~320k
Seat 4: ~260k
Blinds 800/1600 with 200 ante. I hold 7s5d on the button.

Preflop: Folds to seat 4 on HJ, he raises to 5000, CO folds, I raise to 16500 and say “alright, sorry man, one more time.” Folds back to seat 4 who calls.
Flop: Tc 9c 7c
Seat 4 checks, I bet 21k, seat 4 insta folds Kd Kh face up. Juuuuuuuuuyah are you serious?

I lost 15k with AKo to the Singaporean who 3 bets me pre flop (his 3 bet range is JJ+ I promise) where I call his reraise and check fold a Q25 flop. We go to dinner soon after and I can’t stop telling people the 75o hand.

We get back from dinner and the table is feeling chatty after having a break. The Brit in seat 3 asks me where he knows me from. Again he tells me I look so familiar but he can’t figure out why. We have the same conversation trying to figure out if it was a pre lim event or the Bellagio but again he wasn’t here.

A little while into the level I am again of course playing absurdly aggressive. I am raising my button/CO with a combined 95% frequency when folded to. My button especially is absurdly easy as Tim will never shoot back in the small and the BB comments every time “one of these days I’m gonna find a hand worth that raise and call you.” That’s a less than intimidating threat when I know his plan is to check-fold most flops. About a half hour into the level, the BB finally gets his wish when the following hand develops:
BB: ~150k
Me: ~310k
Blinds 1000/2000 with 200 300 ante. I hold Kh Qh on the button.

Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 6500, SB folds, BB says “I finaly got a hand worth 6500, I call!.”
Flop: Kc Qc Ks
I want to laugh so bad. I mean jesus, how [censored] good do I run. I keep my face stoic behind my sunglasses and wait for his move. BB says “I’m gonna go ahead and shoot first here” and throws out 15k. I call.
Turn: Ah
BB thinks and checks. I bet 25k. BB considers his options and calls.
River: 5h
BB checks. I think I screwed up here a little and didn’t bet weak enough, as I fired 50k (which is only half pot, but this is live people.) The BB mulls it over and folds, telling me had Ac7c. A bunch of cameras are on us during the hand, and considering I want to keep things nice on the table and the BB giving me credit when I raise I lay my hand down face up next to the KQK on the board.
”Just a full house! Hahaha!”
I grab the cards off the table and pull them up in my hand 5 draw style “I’m keeping these dealer, now lets play 5 draw people.”
The table is in laughter and the BB finds this all very amusing (especially feeling good that he made the right fold.)
“How am I supposed to win when I’m playing a hand vs Tom Cruise?”
Suddenly the light bulb goes off over the Brit in seat 3’s head.
“That’s where I know you from! Top Gun!”
I smash the table with my hand “THAT’S RIGHT! ENGLISH…MAN. I AM DANGEROUS!”
The table is rolling in laughter, the dealer is enjoying the spectacle to much to even keep dealing.
“You can be my wingman any day!” says the Brit.
”[censored]! You be mine!”
Finally the dealer begins sorting up the cards and taking my full house away from me and we keep playing. At this point almost everyone on the table is laughing and joking with each other except the extremely quiet Asian guy in seat 5 with his ipod. His days are numbered.

In the next couple rounds I lose 30 or 40k back when I raise pre flop and get called by the Singaporean. I C bet into him and he min raises me and I have to give up. He had been doing this occasionally, though sometimes he also folded to my C bets. I’m not hitting flops very well. The Asian guy in seat 5 is playing very tight and I am playing very loose aggressive when the following hand comes up:
His stack: ~110k
My stack: ~300k
Blinds 1000/2000 with 300 ante. I am UTG+1 with AA.

Preflop: UTG raises to 7000, I reraise to 21000, folds back to UTG who considers his options and goes all in, I call instantly. “SHiiiiiiiiiiit” says UTG. Wow this feels familiar. UTG flips up………….AcQc. He’s drawing dead by the turn and walks off remorsefully. “I don’t get it, that guy played super tight for hours. What the hell?”
”I guess he just got tired of all your raising Maverick” says the Brit.
”Huh, I tried to tell him I am dangerous, guess he had his Ipod on.”

At this point my stack climbs to a massive 410k. A new dealer comes to the table, a woman of about 35-40. I’m not sure how it gets started, but the Brit says something flirtatious towards her. She playfully shoots him down (though in a manner that expressed some interest.)
”Don’t worry Brit, you’ll get her. The accent always does, I found that out in Australia.”
“Maybe, but I don’t have your slick clothes and glasses Mav.”
”Yea? Okay here you go take em.”
I rip off my jacket and sunglasses and hand them to him. The dealer gets in on the act and tells me to take my shirt and pants off as well. The Brit now continues playfully hitting on dealer. The event was reported on Cardplayer as follows:
“Dunst Helps A Brother Out

Tony Dunst, who is almost always sporting a coat jacket, slacks and a button down, offered up his sharp duds to a smooth-talking british tablemate who was hitting on the dealer. Dunst was joking with the brit, who he described inherently smooth due to his accent, when he offered his shades and jacket up so that the brit might have a better shot wooing the dealer. Dunst is probably in such a good mood due to the fact that he has climbed above $400,000.”
After this little incident I play perhaps the most mind boggling hand of my poker career. It was vs Seat 4 again, and went down as follows:
My stack: ~380k
Seat 4: ~300k
Blinds 1000/2000 with 300 ante. I holds Ad8d UTG+1. (The raise will seem a little loose and small, but I can assure you at this table, it was all that was necessary.)

Preflop: UTG folds, I raise to 6500, folds to seat 4 in BB, BB calls.
Flop: Th 8h 5s
BB checks, I bet 8500, BB calls. I table is still in a joking mood so I say to the dealer “no heart! For the love of god no heart!”
Turn: Jc
BB checks, I check.
River: Ac
BB checks. I figure it’s going to be very hard to get value from him so I bet really tiny, 13k. The BB quickly flips his cards face up towards the muck but not in the muck. I look over, yep I was right, two hearts. NO WAIT. THAT’S THE QUEEN OF HEARTS AND NINE OF HEARTS. I think for sure the BB must have misread his hand.
“You folded a straight???”
The BB replies in the most calm and serious of manner
”That’s right. I folded a straight.”
All over the table, heads ASPLODE. I look over at Tim and seat 8 on my left, and we are all giving each other the most “WTF!?!?!” look I can imagine.

Strangely, after this hand, it seemed like seat 4 refused to fold to me ever again. We played a pot or two before break and he’d either raise and I’d flat call, then he’d check min raise me on the flop. Or I’d raise and he’d call, and raise my C bet. It was pretty annoying and started depleting my stack a little, but not too much. Still, his mentality verse me had clearly changed.

We go on our final break of the night and are told that when we return we’ll be playing to 350 players and calling it quits for the evening. I decide that my table will likely be feeling very tired and just want to make day 3, so I’ll step up the aggression. Unfortunately, I’m also feeling very tired as the running on 4 hours of sleep and Redbull is beginning to catch up to me. When we get back seat 4 is really doing his best to run over the table with a lot of open 4-6X raises. I’m trying to find hands to 3 bet him with or good ones to cold call, but my hands are god awful. He is also assaulting my BB from his button with vigor. Finally about 45 minutes into the level I post my BB and knowing button will raise, I decide if I have anything even slightly playable, I am going after him. The cards are dealt out and I peek down at Kd2d. Good enough damn it. The action goes as follows:
His stack: ~310k
My stack: ~380k
Blinds 1200/2400 with 300 ante. I hold Kd 2d in the BB.

Preflop: Folds to button, button makes it 10k, SB folds, I reraise to 35k. Button calls.
Flop: A Q Q rainbow with a diamond.
Here I make a big mistake. Since he’d been fighting back with min raises a lot and I’d been unable to stop him post flop, betting here is just asking to get min raised. If I want to try and take this pot I should check raise. Unfortunately at this point in time I am very tired and not thinking clearly, and lead out 40k. He quickly pops me to 80k. [censored]. My. Stupidity. I give up the hand and cost myself 75k and the table chip lead.

I manage to rebuild my stack into the mid 300k’s with aggressive open raises. At this point in time if seat 4 folded, it was probably +EV to open raise any 2. The table line up was still the same, Tim on my left nursing a short stack he refused to move in, seat 8 playing ultra tight. Seat’s 1 and 2 are still super nits. The only guy giving me trouble is the Singaporean in seat 9 who sometimes will cold call my raise and raise me on the flop when I C bet. I decide the next time he tries to do that I’m going to give him a taste of his own medicine with a check raise and hopefully freak him out since I hadn’t taken that line before. With very little time left in the day (seeing as only like 360 players were left) the following hand comes up:
My stack: ~340k
Singaporean: ~240k
Blinds 1200/2400 with 300 ante. I hold Q4o in MP2.

Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 7500, folds to Singaporean on button, he calls, blinds fold.
Flop: 767 rainbow.
I check, Singaporean bets 15k, I make it 40k, he instantly min reraises me. God damn it. I debate 4 betting all in, but I haven’t had a chance to see what he’s min raising with ALL DAY (and believe me, I had been watching and waiting carefully, but when your at a table that only knocks out 2 guys in like 5 hours you don’t get a lot of showdowns) so I decide not to take that huge risk. I fold.

For the remainder of the day I continue aggressive play without getting in any more trouble, as it begins seeming clear to me that I’m so exhausted that my thought process might not have its full clarity. When everything is said and done with I sit with $292,500, which although still a large stack, isn’t quite the amount of advantage 400k would have given me. I’m not sure how I feel about the two moves I made near the end of the day, I know for sure the lead vs seat 4 was a mistake but given his assault on my BB I’m fine with the pre flop reraise. It’s a lot to think about, but at least I have enough chips to raise hell on the day 3 bubble, when we really fly into the dangerzone.

In all honesty, going into today’s main event, I’m not looking forward to it. In some manner of speaking, I don’t even want to play it. That doesn’t mean I actually wouldn’t, or I’m going to play badly. In fact, I know deep down I’ll play every WSOP ME until the day I die because it’s obviously the most +EV tournament of the entire year, and nothing comes close. It’s also incredibly crowded, noisy, disorganized, long, and miserable.

I head down to the insane Amazon room which is as packed as I can remember it. I’m seated way in the corner on table 153, which will be one of the first to break. My table contains nobody notable except for David Oppenheim, whose a few seats on my right and shouldn’t be a problem, especially since I’m just some unknown donk to him. The rest of the table seems pretty normal for the ME, nervous looking qualifiers and people with to much money who enthusiastically wish everyone “Good luck!! See you guys at the final table! Hehehehe!”

We start with 20k and 50/100 blinds, and at 200 BB’s deep with god awful players I am playing as many pots as possible. I overhear the guy in seat 8 discussing how good Stevepa is and ask if he knows him.
“Yea, I got 2nd to him at the PCA in 2006.” Good to know. The first interesting pot of the day comes up vs Steve’s old friend:

My stack: 18k
His stack: 23k
I hold Jh Js in MP1

Preflop: Folds to hero, I raise to 300, MP2 calls, CO calls, button calls, SB folds, BB calls.

Flop: As Jc 3c
BB checks, I bet 800, folds to CO (seat 8), CO raises to 2400, folds back to me, I deliberate and reraise to 7500. Seat 8 tanks for quite a while now and considers his options. He more or less has no idea who I am or how I play, just that I seem pretty agro. Eventually, he stacks up his chips and pushes them into the middle, I instantly call. He knows he’s screwed and flips up AJo.
Turn: X
River: X
Boo yah, a very early day double up.

I continue to play very LAG and my stack stays around the mid to high 30’s. Eventually the guy in seat 5 (I am in seat 4) shows up an hour late and is roughly 21 and smells AWFUL. He smells like he has been rolling around in [censored] for 2 hours while smoking weed. Numerous people on the table immediately begin to ask “Is there a skunk in here? What’s that smell? It smells exactly like a skunk.” I am a little tired and very infuriated that some stupid [censored] who shows up a hour late didn’t even bother to shower and I spend the rest of my time at the table distracted by his god awful smell and desperately resisting the urge to strangle him and throw him in the trash. At one point where a floor man I’m friendly with comes over and looks at our table (as we’re about to break) I stand up and start chatting to him, loud enough so that I let anyone at the table whose listening hear me.
“Hey man, we’re breaking next right?”
”Yep, you guys will be broken in a few minutes.”
”Oh thank god. The [censored] on my left shows up an hour late and smells so [censored] awful the people at the table think there’s a skunk in the room.”
”You’re kidding.”
”No, it’s so [censored] bad I can barely concentrate. I can’t really sit at the table.”
”Hmm, ya know in one of our meetings we had discussions about this sort of situation, whether one of the floor persons should inform these people they need to go back to their room and freshen up.”
“You might wanna let this one know. His tables will complain, I promise.”

Finally our table breaks and I get moved to a table full of guys mostly in their young 30’s with about 35k in my stack. I get my stack near 40k when a weird hand comes up. The villain in question was a guy I had been cold calling a lot and taking pots from post flop, it seemed like every time he had a hand so did I, and that I caught better post flop. He had yet to get the best of me in a pot and I sucked him out with 5 outs once when I floated bottom pair intending to take it away on the turn or value him if I hit (which I did, in both regards.) The UTG player in this hand is very weak/honest.
Hero: ~40k
MP2: ~30k
UTG: ~25k
Blinds 100/200. I hold 8c 8s in the SB.

Preflop: UTG limps, folds to MP2, MP2 raises to 900, folds to hero in SB, I call, BB folds, UTG calls.

Flop Td 2d Tc
I check, UTG checks, MP2 bets 1100. That’s a tiny little bet into this pot and I’m fairly sure he’d C bet weak like this with over cards. I intend to call once and give up to further action on the turn. I call, UTG folds.
Turn: 5c
Now something really weird happens. The physical button in this hand is kind of between me and the player on my right, making it ambiguous as to who actually is on the button. While i'm staring at MP2 for a few seconds to see if he reacted, he checks out of turn, and from what i can tell, totally honestly. He literally thinks I'm the button. I decide i've likely caught him with overcards and bet 2300. He calls without to much thought. Okay?
River: 3s
Now he sorta looks over and goes "wait, wheres the button?" I inform him i'm the SB. He thinks it over and leads out 1000. What. The. [censored]. Okay, fine, i call. He shows QQ. Masterfully played sir.

This pot knocks me down to the low 30's and i try to play aggressively until i get moved tables. I'm sent to a new table that's again a very soft line up, except there is one online player, Polpolpol, who turns out is from the island of Cyprus. We discuss in depth whos good and bad at poker, mostly online players, and become friendly. I am still new to my table (been there a few rounds) when the following hand comes up:
My stack: ~32k
CO's stack: ~20k
Blinds 200/400 with 50 ante. I hold AsQd in the SB.

Preflop: 4 limps to me including the CO, i raise to 2700, folds around to CO, CO calls. CO is youngish but clearly not an online player. He seems nervous and unsure of himself but also not clueless.
Flop Js 5s 5h
I bet 3400, CO thinks for quite a while, looks over his stack, mulls it over, and calls.
Turn: 4d
I check intending to see him bet most if not all his remaining stack and blow me out. CO thinks over his options. His stack contains two orange 5000's, a few yellow 1000's, some green 25's and a few black 100's. He gathers up all his non orange chips and bets them, roughly 3-4k. This is kind of weird. Why not bet the oranges? Why bet so small? I think it over and decide there is no hand he holds considering preflop/flop action that can call a shove here unless he's bad enough to limp/call JJ. My line will look like a big pair and freak him out, i'm almost certain he'll fold despite having half his stack in. I shove. CO looks totally disgusted and after 5-10 seconds, folds his hand. Polpolpol begins laughing "holy [censored] dude! you just pulled one off!"
"I did?"
"Yea you did?"
I flip up my hand. "Holy [censored]! I totally did."
CO looks like someone ripped his heart out. Polpolpol can't control his laughter, the table freaks in general.

That pot puts my stack to around 40k again. I continue to play aggressive and often c bet, as well as hit hands. I get my stack to around 50k when the following hand comes up vs polpolpol:
Pol: 5400
Me: ~50k
Blinds 200/400 with 50 ante. I hold Ad 3d in the BB.

Preflop: Folds to Pol UTG+2, he considers his options and limps, folds to me in BB, i check feeling very suspecious of him.
Flop: 7d 8d 9h
Well, no getting away now even if he limped aces. I check, Pol bets 600, i make it 4000, he insta shoves, i obv calls. Pol flips up 88 and his set holds putting him around 10k. Fair enough, no harm done.

I continue my absurdly aggressive play and nobody bothers to make a point of stopping me. I continue to rebuild my stack when another hand comes up vs Polpolpol:
Hero: ~50k
Pol: ~10k
Blinds 200/400 with 50 ante. I hold Kh Ks in the BB.

Preflop: Folds to Pol UTG+2, Pol raises to 1200, folds to me in the BB. I call.

Flop: Kd Ts 7d
I check, Pol bets 2000. I grab my stack of yellow 1000's and jam them in the middle. Pol tanks forever. He stares me down hardcore and even tho i'm wearing sunglasses i playfully put my hands over my eyes. He tanks, tries talking to me but i won't respond. He mutters out loud "i've seen you do this twice now with a bluff or semi bluff. Do you know how weak you look?" He tanks some more, and finally, slides his chips into the middle. "Top set" i announce. "Shiiiiiiiiiiiit" he flips over his Tc8c and is totally destroyed. Turn/river don't bring his running quads and we shake hands as he walks off.

With Pol gone my table is totally devoid of a player aggressive enough to shoot back. I go beserk. Unfortuately a little while after he's gone our table gets broken up. I mutter to myself about how unlucky this is, that i can't possibly get a table softer than that.
WRONG.

I show up at my new table. The mean age was probably 50. It was just incredible, a bunch of middle aged and old nits and a few very nervous 30 something online qualifiers. Everyone is playing INCREDIBLY weak tight and i absolutely go to town. I was playing roughly 40/35 poker and showing all my good hands just so people might think i was just running hot. I was also friendly and talkative and got everyone on my side of the table to like/respect me so nobody felt like giving me any trouble. My stack goes from 65k to 100k without a meaningful showdown, or having to turn over to weak of a hand. It feels amazing. I feel like an all star major leager who's brought in to play 12 year olds at wiffle ball, it was just way to easy. Everyone at the table seems really nice, but they were missing really really basic stuff. The guy on my right's open raise is to 5000 at 300/600 because he's scared to play post flop. Nobody knows what a resteal is. I would randomly 3 bet people with ATC when i felt like taking a pot and am never opposed. I raise the button/CO with around 95% consistency and am only 3 bet once, though often called and check folded to on the flop.

With about 2 or 3 minutes left in the day i have worked my stack up to an almost exact 100k at 400/800 blinds. The player in seat 1 (i am seat 9) is a very old super nit whos blind i have been destroying for hours. The following hand develops between the two of us:
His stack: 65-70k
My stack: ~100k
Blinds 400/800 100 ante. I hold A A in the SB, he is UTG.

Preflop: UTG raises to 4000, folds to me, i raise to 12000, BB folds. It's back to UTG who takes a second to think. Now the oddest thing happens, that at the time, i was completely unaware of. A 30ish player in MP who was the only semi aggressive player on the table assumes that UTG will stall out the remainder of the tournament clock and immediately tells the dealer to clock him. This apparantly annoys UTG hardcore who grabs all his orange 5000's and throws them into the middle, making it 49000. I sit there stunned for a moment, i can't beleive my luck. I calmly announce all in. UTG calls immediately. The entire table wonders if we both have AA, considering how tight this guy is i kinda expect him to fold AA here. I show my AA and UTG mutters "[censored]" and flips up AKo. I can't beleive my [censored] luck. Like 85 BB's with AKo 2 minutes before it ends from a super nit? I pinch myself forcfully to see if i am dreaming, but fail to wake up drenched in my own tears as normal. Looks like this is real.
Flop: K T 4
Oh come on dude, no way. That would be to sick.
Turn: J
No please. No win for him, no chop pot. It's my turn damn it!
River: 5

Boo yah!!! The entire table is floored. I am stunned, a MASSIVE pot is shipped my way. I shake hands with UTG who politely wishes me luck. The table CAN'T BELEIVE he put so much money in with AK. MP2 informs me that he called the clock on him and jokingly says i should thank him for that pot. I ask the dealer if i can tip MP2. The dealer is also stunned.

After this we play one more hand which the aggro player raises and i let him take with Q4o (3 betting would have commited his stack, and i don't think he would have minded getting chips or going home, he seemd pretty smart) and we wrap up the day. Allow me to give you some interesting end of the day statistics:

Starting stack: $20,000
Ending stack: $168,900
Sets flopped: 5
Aces dealt: 2
Kings dealt: 3
Queens dealt: 2 or 3
Jacks dealt: 2
Suck outs i took: 0

It was very possibly the smoothest day of poker in my entire life. Truly, it was the perfect game.