My last two sessions have been short and painful. Two days ago I played only 91 hands and got crushed for a little less than a buy-in. Every hand I raised was re-raised pf, my c-bet was called/raised, or they bet the turn on me. None of these players were getting out of line and I really had jack to do anything with so I really just had to lay these hands down. I ended up losing a big pot at the end of the session and I felt the tilt monster so I just said I will come back tomorrow.

My session last night was even worse. I didn't play my first maybe 25 hands dealt to me because I had garbage and most of the pots were either raised PF or the players in the blinds had huge VPIP's and very low Fold to Blinds Steal. So I said I will just play this session nice and tight and just get some value bets in there. I didn't really listen to myself. I slowplayed a flopped bottom's full house that I don't think I should have, to me it was a clear raise on the flop. Something has been up the last two nights. For one I had AIM open. I don't like to blame chatting with one person on AIM how is railing me about the lines I took and stuff, but I didn't have a single read really on any of the players at the table. The slowplayed bottom's full I knew I was suppose to raise but my mind wasn't clear and was racing with decisions on what I should do and all that along with telling my friend what I held so he can watch the hand play out from my perspective. I only played 86 hands and lost a little less than a buy in here. In two short sessions I lost 2/3's of my winnings since playing 25NL and also dropped my HUGE win rate from 21ptbb/100 to 5ptbb/100. Only like 800 hands (I one table for now).

I think it was clear when I was looking back at some of my winning and losing sessions what was going on. In my winning sessions I was just playing no other distractions. I was focused not tired I was really conditioned to play. My losing sessions I was either not as focus because of distractions or I was bringing things with my from life to the table. These are two mistakes that I have been making for a long, long time and I think a lot of other players make the same mistakes too. Some of you guys can play 12 tables. That is great, but I can't focus on 3, let alone IMing also. If I want to develop my game and get better at poker I need to talk about my sessions after and put more focus into the session that is in front of me right now.

Another thing came to mind, my work ethic has been lacking big time these last few days. For one, I am super stressed right now as dealers school is coming to an end and I don't know what is going to happen next. I have never really felt anxiety or was able to identify it when I have felt it before, but I think I am feeling it big time now. There are just so many ways my life can go right now, so many things up in the air that I am losing focus and getting lazy. Time to change that starting NOW!

Adjusting to moving and all that other crap that has been going on has been hard. I finally got back on my horse and played my first session last night and this morning I finally started my duties as AC Rep for TwoRags. I have been browsing and posting on the 2p2 forums and getting back into the game a little bit lately. I didn't want to jump right into my normal limit cold so I started slow with just railing a little bit here and there. A few days ago I played a couple $1 tourneys and the 10c Rebuy on FTP. No luck, but I was feeling more comfortable with my reads and such.

Last night I finally decided to jump into my usual 25NL game. I searched for a little while and found the juciest table I have ever seen in my life. There were a few TAGish players, but they were playing so bad cause there were 2 60/8/3ish players at the table playing like complete donks and everyone at the table were adjusting. I just tightened up and played really solid and over limped in a lot more spots than I normally would. These two guys werent folding to a raise so I only raised premium hands and I limped with a lot of pairs/suited connectors that I would normally raise against Avg. 25NL players. Another thing I noticed which is a very important betting pattern I think people don't take note of enough is that when they lead the flop it meant total weakness. They slowplayed all their "big" hands so a flop bet was an obvious bluff. I was able to take down a buy-in in a short session although I was up close to 1.5 BI's at one point. This was a high variance table and you are going to get sucked out on here and there live with it. I was pretty happy with my game, although I think I made one huge mistake that was a direct result of my rustiness. I did not think though all my decisions. I made too many snap decisions that caused me to make some raises or calls I don't think I would have made if I thought them a bit.

Anyway here are some hands:

Full Tilt Poker, $0.10/$0.25 NL Hold'em Cash Game, 8 Players
LegoPoker Hand History Converter

MP1: $22.25
MP2: $16.45
CO: $51
BTN: $24.65
SB: $9.10
Hero (BB): $32.35
UTG: $25.35
UTG+1: $32.50

Pre-Flop: A Q dealt to Hero (BB)
UTG folds, UTG+1 calls $0.25, 2 folds, CO calls $0.25, BTN calls $0.25, SB folds, Hero checks

Flop: ($1.10) A 9 T (4 Players)
Hero bets $0.60, UTG+1 raises to $2.25, 2 folds, Hero calls $1.65

Turn: ($5.60) 5 (2 Players)
Hero checks, UTG+1 bets $4.25, Hero calls $4.25

River: ($14.10) 5 (2 Players)
Hero checks, UTG+1 bets $25.75 and is All-In, Hero calls $25.60 and is All-In

Results: $65.30 Pot ($3 Rake)
Hero showed A Q (two pair, Aces and Fives) and WON $62.30 (+$29.95 NET)
UTG+1 showed T 4 (two pair, Tens and Fives) and LOST (-$32.35 NET)


Full Tilt Poker, $0.10/$0.25 NL Hold'em Cash Game, 9 Players
LegoPoker Hand History Converter

BTN: $20.55
SB: $9.75
BB: $41.20
UTG: $35.35
UTG+1: $5.50
UTG+2: $10
Hero (MP1): $62.65
MP2: $25
CO: $8.10

UTG+2 posts $0.25
Pre-Flop: Q A dealt to Hero (MP1)
2 folds, UTG+2 checks, Hero raises to $1.10, MP2 calls $1.10, 3 folds, BB calls $0.85, UTG+2 folds

Flop: ($3.65) Q T 5 (3 Players)
BB bets $0.25, Hero raises to $4.40, MP2 folds, BB calls $4.15

Turn: ($12.45) J (2 Players)
BB bets $2, Hero calls $2

River: ($16.45) 9 (2 Players)
BB bets $3, Hero calls $3

Results: $22.45 Pot ($1.10 Rake)
BB showed 8 J (a straight, Queen high) and WON $21.35 (+$10.85 NET)
Hero mucked Q A (a pair of Queens) and LOST (-$10.50 NET)


The first hand was the easiest call I ever made. The second I was so lost in the hand, and the play was a result of not thinking through my decisions enough although IDK if I could play it any differenty. Both of these hands were against the super donks.

As for my AC Rep work, I walked from Bally's to the Showboat today and got some info on some of the rooms. I have a lot more work to be done, but look out for some updates in the future.

There is no other way to describe it. This has been the most emotionally and mentally tough month of my life. I am not big into posting about my personal life, but basically I had a very sudden death in my family. This member was some one that was very close to me and some of the things I had to go through these past days were the hardest I have ever had to go through in my life. I am doing ok, although these tough times really did test my emotional strength.

On a lighter note, because of my family issues I was not able to play a single hand of poker in the past month or so. I was just about to sit down and put in my first session and I got the call that flipped my world upside down for the last week. I do not think I will reach any of my goals and I think a lot of them have changed. I just have a few goals now, enjoy life and make some money!

I am still in dealers school, we start Omaha tonight. I cant wait as its a crazy game with a lot of side pots and since its mostly played PL we really need to know the size of the pot. It is going to be tough to keep track of everything while going through the dealing procedures but I think I will be fine.

Hopefully in the next day or so I will post some session hands and such. I do remember what I intended this blog to be. I intended it to be a journal of my ups and downs in poker, the mistakes I made and the things I think I did right. It has really turned into a diary of my life and I don't want to go in that direction any more. I will not post a Blog that says "hey I won today here are some hands" I want to give some detail as to what was going on and how I went about things. Expect to see more of that in the future.

So for this blog I decided to post all my goals both poker related and for many other things too. I think its pretty clear that my September was not what I wanted it to be. I thought I was playing some of the best poker that I have played ever and I was running really well, but I played less than 1k hands. I had a lot going on with moving to A.C. and being really tired after dealer's school at night. I have also been a bit lazy lately also, probably because I haven't worked out in a few weeks. I worked out 4-5 days a week over the summer and I was feeling great and had a ton of energy. Since I live in a barren wasteland (in regards to businesses), not only can I not afford to go to a gym but the closest one that I know of is 30 minutes away. I need to come up with some sort of program that I can do at home as well as get some running in during the morning hours.

As for poker goals, I would like to play 5k hands in October. I think this is a very attainable goal as well as a goal that is not going to force me to play too many tables or play when I don't want to play. I think if I play an hour or two each night I will do just fine as far as this goal goes. I was playing too well to give up a solid win-rate by not playing enough hands. I also want to study for around 2x the amount of time I play each day. So lets say I average about 1 1/2 hours each day of poker. I would like to at least read/post/read and reply to posts for around 3 hours per day. I think this really gets your poker mind flowing and it enables to make a lot of decisions at the poker table second nature leaving you some brain power to work things out instead of having to focus on making sure you are doing the basics correctly. This sort of goes along with my second goal, but I want to post at least two hands from each session played and reply to at least 5 posts per day (strategy) on 2+2.

For life, these are much tougher. Every second that I am not doing more important things I need to be practicing my dealing techniques. Throughout the first week of class I noticed that I am pretty good at the pitch and stuff, but it is still taking a lot of my energy to make sure I do everything correctly which is taking away from me knowing the size of the pot (how much to rake and when) as well as making a bunch of stupid mistakes because I have too much going on for me. Basically, I feel that making sure my pitch is super good is the most important. Once I get that down I think things will start to smooth out. After that knowing all the steps of a Stud hand (for a dealer) and making those steps second nature will make counting the pot, seeing who has the strongest hand, making side pots, taking the rake, calling out the action 100000x easier. I have a table, chips, and cards so there is no excuse to not be the best poker dealer to walk through that school as I have many hours out of everyday to work on my skills. Obviously the next goal is to get a job. I can't afford to live here for too much longer without one. I get the impression that we will get an audition upon graduation from school so if I kill it who knows I might be doing well quicker than I thought. Besides all that, restrict my spending. Since I can't go to the gym eating healthy is not a concern of mine right now eating cheap is. I just need enough energy to get through reading a book, dealing out a few cards and clicking a mouse all day so I don't need huge expensive meals to get by. I took a gamble coming down here and I need to only spend when I NEED to for right now. If I get a cash dealing job sometime soon things will obviously be different. I can pick up that flat screen T.V. and the Xbox360 I so badly want. I can dip into my wants if that happens, but for now I can only afford my needs.

I have one goal that I know is not going to be reached this month, but once I get a solid job I have to save. The real reason I am down here is to save up some cash to help pay to get my teachers certification. I want to be a gym teacher and I felt coming down here and hopefully making some good money combined with low rent will help me attain this goal much easier than I would have at home.

I think all of these goals are very reasonable and attainable with a little hard work and dedication and for some of them some really good luck. I think I have been fortunate in my life so far, but I have been through a lot of bumps in the road. This is by far the biggest bump, but I think I am mentally tough enough to get myself through October for sure. If I don't do well in my audition I will try try again. I signed a year long lease down here so I have plenty of time to keep trying to earn myself a job and some money as well. For the rest of you, I hope all your goals are reached in Oct and good luck.

Hey guys, I am semi moved into my apartment now and I finally have cable and internet! I obviously have not played any poker and was not able to blog until I was online again. So I guess this blog will consist of an update on how dealers school is going and a little about what my apartment is like.

Basically, I live in this really small, quiet town in a large Victorian house that was changed into 4 different apartments. Mine is on the first floor and its a long rectangle. So the room are not very wide, but the amount of sq. footage that I have is much more than I actually need. I am playing $700/mo. +cable, internet phone ($99/mo.), gas and electric (heat is gas). So I am assuming its going to end up being somewhere around $805-$900/mo. I have a tiny like 13'' T.V. because that was all I needed throughout college and the couch I brought doesn't even fit in the living room lol. I have my poker table in the living room with my tiny T.V. and I just practice dealing for most of the afternoons until class starts at 8pm.

I moved in on Saturday and I live right behind a bar. So I am assuming after my first night alone that the weekends are going to be pretty loud around here at night. I woke up at 3:30am to a bar fight right outside my front door my first night alone. This made me suuuuper uncomfortable for the first few nights, but I am becoming much more comfortable now as the weekday's are very quiet and relaxing. I never thought living alone would be so difficult, but when you live in a town where you literally know not a single person it is quite taxing. I literally spent the first day or so without speaking a single word. I talked to a former roommate yesterday and he is doing the same thing and he put it perfectly he said, "It makes you appreciate everything you had so much more." When I would talk on the phone with parents when I was in college all I wanted to do was get off the phone, but now I truly enjoy speaking to them as well as friends. Anyway, while I am in school I would love to make a little money so I applied to places like Shoprite, Acme, Blockbuster and I hope to hear from them soon so I can like buy food and stuff.

Now, school is awesome! I have a really cool teacher and hes really good as well. I am learning 1-5 stud high right now which is a game I don't normally play so I am learning a little about how stud works. The first night was easy we worked on our pitch a little and we learned the basics of stud and hand rankings. The second night was awesome. We got into the box and went over an entire sequence of how a 7-card stud hand would go from the shuffle to shipping the pot to the winner. There is a special way to do everything and its fun to learn all this new stuff. I am also getting the impression that our teacher (a former poker room manager of a number of rooms in A.C.) is going to be getting all of us auditions which will be great because if we do well we get a job right away maybe. This got me super excited and I am ready to work harder than I have ever worked.

As for poker, I don't sleep well here yet. I don't want to play in the afternoons because the games are so much better at night so I have to get used to coming back from school at about 11pm and feel up to play. I have just been too drained to even try and play my A game so I haven't played a hand it probably a week. I got my first good night of sleep last night (because I drank a little vodka before I went to bed) so we will see how I feel tonight, I would love to put a session in. Alright, good luck at the tables and I hope to find a job so I can afford the gas to dive to the casinos and to school and to work and all that crap every day so I can start updating the A.C. poker room pages. If I don't get a job within a few weeks I will call a connection I have at Caesars and I can possibly get a job doing some bull crap while I am waiting for an audition(s).